A listening ear: On volunteer mental health support
In response to our ongoing series on mental health, and our recent focus on supporting those with thoughts of suicide, a member of our diocese who volunteers as a Samaritan has shared some thoughts around mental health in that space and where she hears God in the phone calls.
I volunteered to become a Samaritan because of their ethos of not giving advice and being willing to allow people to ‘just be’. Samaritans does not put any pressure on callers to resolve their situations, regardless of how many times a person needs to talk about their life and problems. We don’t judge people, give advice or refer them to other agencies and this I believe is important and valued by our callers. I have been a Sam for about twelve months and find a new learning experience in every call. Not everyone is positive or feels safe enough to vent their feelings but that is okay! I don’t expect any thanks for what I do from callers, but when a caller does acknowledge your input, I find this reaffirms to me why I do what I do.
Samaritans undergo initial training and then are buddied up with an experienced Samaritan for approximately 60 hours or more before we are allowed to take calls on our own. This is both for our safety and so we can better respond to the callers. My background is in victim support, suicides and unexpected deaths, Family Harm and NZ Fire Service. This combined background of thirty plus years is the backbone of experience that I call upon, plus pastoral care within my parish which helps me greatly. I have lost a lot of friends of all ages to suicide, so this has always been close to my heart. Many friends have had ongoing mental health issues, and that is a very involved and underrated cause of distress in all communities.
When taking a call I often say a silent prayer for guidance around what to say or not say to the caller. They may present as suicidal and so I pray that they are safe, as Samaritans work on the basis of anonymity and don’t record calls or trace callers. I send up a prayer that God takes care of them and that is special to me, I am always thanking God for his involvement and readily acknowledge that without his support I could not do this work.
The joys are often something as simple as a “thank you” from a caller or even the black humour that we sometimes resort to with other Samaritans, and that is a necessary coping skill. Difficult calls differ for everyone. For me it’s the sadness of people who have mental health needs and can’t access help until they’re in crisis. It reinforces how broken our mental health system is sadly. Some callers were Christians but are now ‘nonbelievers'; they often discuss faith and its relevance to their lives but say they have never gone to church or are lapsed believers. I often feel that God is in these type conversations and the person will state that without God in their lives in some form or another they would be in a different and more lonely space.
In New Zealand mental health services there is the expectation for people to be in a crisis situation before help is reluctantly given to them. If we could manage people more humanely earlier on in their distress we could surely lower the suicide rate. If earlier intervention saved one kid’s life with accessible mental health I would happily pay higher taxes!
We as Samaritans work on the basis of anonymity so people that know us are not concerned about ringing Sams. We operate on a 24/7 basis and are all volunteers so we make a commitment to doing so many hours per week. I work with an amazing team that is there for everyone throughout the good, bad and funny moments, and without that support Samaritans couldn’t do what it does and so I am eternally grateful for them all.
