At the beginning of the Covid-19 State of Emergency, as we moved into Alert Level 4 and the lock-down isolation which it required, there were many inspirational pieces circulating about the opportunities which this period of enforced stillness offered to our world, and reassuring reports of wildlife returning to previously polluted places and people supporting one another in heart-felt and creative ways. 

Other articles spoke of the possibility – indeed the need – once this lockdown ended, to do things in a new way and to begin with that gave me great hope. Our own Diocesan team encouraged us through zoom meetings and Movement Online to celebrate the ways in which we were able to continue being Christ’s Body at work in the world by developing relationships, going deeper, growing community, and being signs of God’s love to our household bubbles and our neighbourhoods.

And yet I also felt myself beginning to struggle with all the positive messaging coming out that seemed dissonant with my own feelings of paralysis and weariness, anxiety and inadequacy. How was I to support others and help them to be signs of God’s love if I was feeling grumpy, agitated, irrationally irritable and lacking in energy and the capacity to engage? The messages of new life and transformation began to create anxiety instead of hope within me.

Of course, I do know that it is not all up to me. We are all in this together and resourced by the love of our Divine Companion. And yet those overwhelming emotions sure can stop us in our tracks. It is important to be able to be honest with each other about how we are feeling, and realistic about what we are able to accomplish. We need to recognise that this unprecedented time has affected us in a variety of ways, and that we each deal with stress differently.

A post on Facebook from Jen Y - Founder of Intentional Generations - introduced me to the useful term ‘Reintegration Anxiety’ and outlined some helpful strategies you can find here. I hope that you might find these useful, and that Movement Online might be a good place to continue sharing with honesty about the variety of ways this Covid-19 moment affects us.

By Jean Malcolm